“None of us liveth to himself.” Romans 14:7
God is good all the time. But last week I struggled with
Him. I am sure most of you know the song, ‘Jesus loves the little children, all
the children of the world, red and yellow, black and white, they are precious
in His sight. Jesus loves the little children of the world.’ But I saw
something last week that, for a moment, really made me doubt that simple truth.
We went to visit the children’s hospital. I knew it would be tough seeing sick
children. What I was not prepared for was the room full of sick children with
no parents sitting with them or visiting them. Some of the children were there
for months with TB and had parents who rarely visited. Some had been left there
because there bills were too high. As we handed out beanie babies to the
children, I just looked at them and felt hopeless for them. Does someone love
them? We proceeded to the next wing and entered a room with several babies
laying in beds. They looked perfectly fine, so I asked the nurse what was wrong
with them and she replied, “Nothing, they were just abandoned here and have
nowhere else to go.” So these babies lay in bed all day. I went to pick one up,
who was probably a couple months old, and he just shook in fear because he was
not used to being held. He did not have someone to love him and hold him.
At first I was so upset at God for allowing this to happen
to an innocent child. But as I sat there praying and journaling, I thought of
the kids that I am responsible for. I have thirteen lives that I am supposed to
provide for emotionally, spiritually, mentally, and physically. I was convicted
because there are days that my selfish attitude does not allow me to provide
well for them. So they suffer, like the children in the hospital, when I do not let
the love of God shine through me because of my sin or I become lazy because I
am tired. My goal each day needs to be to give 100% for the Lord, to be broken
bread for Him. It is not good enough to say, "I am here helping the orphans so that is good enough". My life as a worker is the way I say “thank You” to God for his
unspeakable salvation.
Hi Jessica - you and I have not met personally but I so appreciiate and love your parents. MANY years ago I was their pastor. We now live in New Jersey and are able to keep up with them on Facebook. I have been following your blog and so appreciate your sensitivity spiritually and to the needs of others. One of our daughters recently adopted from Ethiopia...we are so thrilled and thankful to have these two new little boys in our family. This coming Sunday I am sharing about our spiritual adoption from Romans 8. A section of this blog so fits into the message I am taking the liberty of sharing a part of it as an illustration in the conclusion. THANKS for being a true instrument of God in your ministry there.
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